Skinned Deep

I was drawn into this movie simply from the delightful cover [insert laugh] and the sheer description: "Girl forced to marry mutant hill billy"  what could possibly go wrong?

The simple premise to the plot of this movie is the Rockwell family vacation, a cheer full all American family rolling through backwater America in their RV. However the daughter gets kidnapped and is forced to marry an inbreed from a family of mutants, to which the blurb declares "will have to use her own cunning and wit" to escape from.

A few spoilers but nobody is going to seriously want to watch this, I've included a Youtube vid of the only bit you need to see lol  

This movie starts basically when the Rockwells get a flat tyre (flat tyre being the queue for "shit's about to go down") so the father decides to go and get help. He come across this local cafe, which is run by an old woman/"grandma" (think Mother's day) who declares that her son is great with cars and invites them to her house.
This is where it starts to get fun, the family find their way to her home, which is a run down old boarded up shanty, she welcomes them has they arrive to the door. The house was decorated by the TCM family so the Rockwells pretend this is fairly normal and just pretend to be pleased for for the hospitality.
By now I'm just thinking this as already done everything in the good old horror book of cheesy movie situations.

Bring on the freaks!!!

Meet the family: We're then treated to a host of colourful characters which include, the surgeon general who we find out doesn't like having his photo taken, so that mom and dad out of the picture in no time.

Brain/Bryan, that name says it all basically to how he's mutated

and then the only reason I decided to watch this piece of garbage in the first place:

Warwick Davies!! when you see his name on the front of a movie that also had a mutant with a metal mouth looking pissed you kind of wonder what the hell he's doing in this  :-*

He's an insane plate throwing midget dressed in all in white with a serious cause of ADHD, called you guessed it Plates.

Warwick in action

Mom's died, Dad's died, your pain in the ass brother gets halved by the Surgeon General and Brain has a serious crush on you.

So what do you do?

That's it! You get tied to a truck, get forced to be kill a guy (by putting a little bit of sand in his mouth?), you then pretend to be crazy, lure Brain into a fault sense of security and kill them as he goes to kiss you.  Once them are done, you then go on a killing spree, bye bye grandma.

This is where it gets more like wtf and they try to get clever by saying "hey this isn't any normal cheap mutant hill billy slasher" with the creator and all his philosophical non-sense about the human race, that you don't give a shit about, because you want to see more mutants dissolving the way Brain did.

The creator turns out to be what I can only describe as a mutilated foetus with dreadlocks, I also need to mention that he's in the robotic body of a body builder, this ensures a laugh out loud fight scene.
She then has a tumble with old metal mouth general. Now what to do now, I know I'll see if the creator's robot body was anatomically correct by whipping up his loin cloth, although his loin cloth had dynamite label across it maybe she wanted to test the claim  ;)  low and behold, actual dynamite to blow up this god damned crap fest so we can all ride off into the sunset.

The general (he's relentless) gets smoked and she has to run him down right after a dream sequence of her died family saying forgiveness is the way, why didn't they just say that at the start and save us all.
Metal mouth gets fucked, robot mutant son of a bitch. She gets to the police station where you get that "clever" ending, she's stuck there, locals all in on it, police is going to finish her.
Credits roll with her screaming, so you scream with her for having wasted your time.

Over all on my list of worst low budget horror movie I've ever seen, Warwick Davies is absolutely brilliant though and there're a few laughable scenes in between the bad acting from princess Rockwell. Not an avoid at all costs, just a well see it for the madness if you fancy lol.